When I was growing up my brothers and sisters and I were very active in family. Our parents were both family-going people, so from the day my brother and I were born we, too, went to family. Our family had a really good, full-time caretaker. He provided us with so many wonderful events and activities that made us want to keep coming to family. Every first day of the week we would all get dressed up and go to family. On that day we would spend 2 to 3 hours at family, mostly for the purpose of listening to the caretaker tell us about the family Book. The Book was available for all of my brothers and sisters and me to read and enjoy on our own, but we always felt we got enough understanding of it by listening to the family caretaker. Besides, he knew it better than any of us anyway; he was a professional family caretaker. On "family day" we would also get to see other people who we didn't normally see very much throughout the week. Everyone was always very cordial and pleasant, and it was always exciting to see new and different faces at the family meeting. This especially pleased the caretaker. After awhile it almost appeared that it was the goal of the family to have more family members, or at least to have more people come to the family meeting on the first day of the week.

In my town, there were several different families. All them were very diverse. They looked different. They talked differently. They did different things. We never associated a whole lot with these other families. Now and then someone might get upset with their own family and go and visit another one, or vice versa. Whenever that happened it always made the caretaker nervous, and he usually would want to meet with that family member to make sure everything was okay. But sometimes we lost some family members to other families in town. But we also gained some family members from other families in town. This was especially true as our family grew larger and began to provide more activities and events. We were very proud to be part of the biggest and best family in town.

One thing I never quite understood about the family was how it was structured. Instead of being chosen for tasks and functions according to what we were gifted to do, our brothers and sisters (well, mostly just brothers) were voted to these roles by the other family members. Then the selected, or "elected," leaders of the family would get together once a month to discuss how the family budget would be spent. This often turned into an very grueling and stressful process for the caretaker. No one ever really knew the reality of what went on in those meetings, especially in the heart of the caretaker. He spent long hours at the family (often the building in which the family met would also be called the family, this was confusing at first, but after awhile you get used to it), in his office preparing proposals for the family leaders, hoping they would all one day catch his vision for the family.

Another very strange thing about our family was the family meal. This was probably the most bizarre event of all family events. First of all, it was hardly ever a meal. Every now and then, say once a month, we would all share a real meal together, usually after the family meeting. But the weekly meal was more of a ritual. There's no doubt it was for a special purpose, and had much meaning. But it was the only meal I ever had where I wasn't allowed to talk to anyone beside me, or even look at anyone beside me for that matter. There was always music played for the meal, but it was very solemn, almost funeral-like music. This was the one part of our family meetings that I always felt had much more potential to bring the family together as a unified group of people who loved one another. Meals usually always do that everywhere else. What better place to have that happen than in a family?

I always thought one of the most difficult jobs anyone could ever have would be a caretaker. It had to be a difficult task trying to help people of the family understand how to be a good family member and share the work of the family, especially when this "persuasion" had to be done primarily during the 30 minute talk the caretaker would always give in the family meeting on the fist day of the week (he had to be sure his talk was no more than 30 minutes, because if it went any longer some of the "key" family members might get angry and leave the family... which meant they would no longer be giving money to our family... this seemed to be a common fear of the family). It was very important to try to keep all the family members happy. And this was the caretaker's job. If he wasn't able to do his job, then the family would simply have to find another caretaker. If someone in the family was sick and in the hospital, it wasn't the brothers' and sisters' responsibility to go and visit that family member, it was the caretaker's. If someone in the family was going through a rough time, they made appointments to talk to the caretaker. In reality, much of the family weight was carried on the shoulders of the caretaker. This was probably why one of the first questions a person might ask when inquiring about our family was, "Who's your caretaker?" Of course it was always followed or preceded by this question, "How many is your family running now?" These seemed to be the most important questions about the family. No matter where you went, those were the two questions you were most likely asked by members of another family.

Whenever my brothers and sisters and I would get frustrated with our family we would usually complain about it, and talk about what we would do differently in the family. On a couple occasions we went to visit another family. It was a lot weirder than our family. They were organized much differently, and the caretaker was not like ours. It quickly became obvious to me that it is hard to find the perfect family.

I am now at the place in my life when I look back over all my family-going years, and I am thankful for where I have been, and what I have received from many other very special family members and caretakers. But it seems strange to me, this concept of "GOING to family." It almost doesn't even make any since. How can one GO to family? Obviously it is possible because I did it for years, and thousands of people still do it today. But is it what was originally intended for the family? Did the Creator of the family intend for His Family to consist of a meeting on the first day of the week, which is led by a caretaker and a few others? Did the Creator of the family intend for a major portion of our time, energy, and resources to go toward building big family buildings? And why is it that some family members seem more important than others? I know no one would ever admit that out loud, but it just seems weird that so many family members never do anything except come to the family meetings at the family on the first day of the week. Maybe I should go check out one of those new "postmodern" families. I'll bet they know how to do family right. Who knows? Maybe "GOING TO FAMILY" is a dying concept altogether, and the family is now finally learning how to BE the family, function as a family, and grow as a family after all. It certainly sounds more natural. Many of our first-ever family members would probably wonder about my grammar skills if they heard me saying things like "going to family" or, "See you at family this week." What does that mean anyway?