As I arrived in San Diego, my friend Randy mentioned that the phrase that people all seemed to be saying was "We're just trying to figure this all out."  And my response was, "Boy when all these people get things figured out, the world will be in for it."

I 've been in the 'conversation' now for about a year and a half--maybe more, depending on what one considers "in the conversation" to be.  I have a sense that for me the conversation, this "trying to figure out" a way of being the church that is faithful to its vocation (as opposed to merely being concerned with forms expressed in the get-up of either modernity or post-modernity), is coming to some sort of resolution.

Well, perhaps not a resolution--maybe it is that I just feel like I have a bit more of a handle on things now.  It's not as new to me as it was last year and that is a good thing.  It means that for me the 'conversation' has progressed.

This creates a problem, however, because some people are just getting into this 'conversation.'  Indeed, it appears that four times as many people are in on the thing.  There were eleven hundred people just at the emergent part of this two-headed animal (the other head being the Youth Specialties National Pastor's Conference).

Yes, the emergent folks got together side by side with those strange creatures known as pre-emergent (primordial?) pastors. You could tell there were two different conferences going on just by looking at the average attire of those walking up and down the halls.  In many cases, you could judge the book by the cover.

We were warned, we emerging ones, at the outset to behave and play nice with the older kids.  I wasn't aware, I suppose, of the animosity.  Maybe I got over it already.  Yeah, probably.

Anyway, if there was any question in the minds of the thousand-plus folks who sat packed into the ballroom as to the 'different' nature of this 'conversation,' all was crystal-clear when the young man dressed in...well, what was he dressed in?...dressed in a sampling of wildly colorful bits of clothing.  Words fail me, but picture a sort of 'punk/Rastafarian' interpretation of a Native American rain-dancer.  If someone came expecting Steven Curtis Chapman to be opening up with "The Great Adventure" they now knew they had made a wrong turn at the registration booth.

The opening session was an ADHD patient's dream.  The carnival (a metaphor for the postmodern landscape) atmosphere set out the conference's intention of being a very different kind of conference for a different kind of culture. 

And in many ways it has been.  From the interactive prayer installations that my friends Lilly and Rob put together to the chill out space to the art tables (at which I spent not a little time), it was very different from the 'other conference.' 

Yet this year's Emergent Conference was also different than my initial introduction to Emergent (the 2002 theological conversation in Houston--which still echoes powerfully in my mind).  First off, this conference is bigger.  Okay, that much is obvious, but the point of stating it is to say that it changes the nature of the thing. 

I really felt it to be much more of a production than a conversation.  Yes, we had many great conversations during our trips to the food courts next door, but I felt like I had less of a voice.  Not to say that I want to have some mic time—I don't—but I felt more like people were talking to me and less like I was in dialogue.  While there was plenty of time for personal conversation over lunch and dinner, there was very little public ‘conversation’.  Whether that is a good or bad thing, I recognize it as an inherent challenge of bigness.

Concerning the seminars, among others, I got to hear Dave Tomlinson, with whom I think I unknowingly shared bread and wine while I was with Ian and the other folks at London's (now disbanded) Epicentre community  (I mention that not because I like to drop names, but because I am in wonder at the fantastic people I keep bumping into, unaware of their ‘celebrity’).

Dave shared about the Church's declining social capital and how we might turn things around.  I don't have the space to explain all he shared, but it was more than worth the attention of all 200(?) people packed into that little seminar room.  I also got to talk to Dave's wife after his presentation and got caught up on how Ian (a bright chap I shared tea with in London) was doing.

More than all the great presentations (and the seminars I went to were very well done by very thoughtful and gifted people like Rob Bell and Chris Seay), I think what I valued from this Emergent Conference was the time I got to spend with old and new friends, partners, and fellow journey-ers--not least of whom were Jason and Brooke who showed us amazing hospitality, and Eric, Tom, Chad, Melody, the folks with Matthew's House, and the amazing group with whom we shared dinner and prayer on Wednesday night. 

One of the things I have already wondered about concerning these emerging church conferences is how it will develop as more and more people 'figure it out.'  How will these events be able to speak to those who are well on their way in the 'conversation' as well as those who've just shown up?  I think it will be a continued challenge for those who are further along to embrace those who are new to the conversation by inviting them to talk over a meal in a restaurant or late at night over a pint. 

I will also be a challenge for the organizers of future Emergent gatherings to keep from centralizing.  Perhaps what we will see from future Emergent conferences will be more, smaller, regional events.  This year’s “big” Emergent was a good experience, but I just wonder if it would be more a reflection of the people who are in the ‘conversation’ to move to a more regionally oriented approach where public dialogue is more feasible and attendance is more financially appropriate to the people involved (we’re mostly church planters for goodness sake!).

There were many more insightful reflections here at the conference concerning how we will find a way forward--not the least of which were stated in the opening session by Dallas Willard, Todd Hunter, and Brian McLaren (a conversation I was initially disappointed in, but now understand to have contained some extremely important cautions).  Thanks should be given to all those friends who worked so hard to pull this thing together.  It was evident that a great deal of personal creative energy was invested, and whether you liked it or not, you should send someone who was involved with putting it together a note of gratitude.  If you were there, let them know what you liked and what you hated, but share your thanks for who they are and the sacrifices they’ve made.

What I will take away from this conference is the companionship of friends old and new. And, even though the 'conversation' is no longer new to me, I will bring with me a determination to continue further in and further up in this pursuit of faithfulness to our vocation as the Church.